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Joke for Addi
ifihadahif Posted: Fri Jan 27 15:49:04 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Addie walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says: "Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."

His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot."

The man says: "I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."

addi Posted: Fri Jan 27 17:26:42 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
I'm so sorry to say I actually laughed out loud. I hate encouraging you.

: )

thanks, hif. i did need a laugh

Mesh Posted: Fri Jan 27 18:05:23 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  Lewl. That's good.

kurohyou Posted: Fri Jan 27 19:51:26 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  That was the hot joke in our office this week as well. For some reason everyone started telling jokes on wednesday and that was the best one of the batch. The rest were lame.


Not that it matters...

FN Posted: Fri Jan 27 20:24:34 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  tuesday is the most productive day of the week, that must be when they thought them out

Can you imagine the urge on wednesday morning to tell the jokes


ifihadahif Posted: Fri Jan 27 21:40:45 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  addi said:
>I'm so sorry to say I actually laughed out loud. I hate encouraging you.
>: )
>thanks, hif. i did need a laugh
I thought you might

Mesh Posted: Sat Jan 28 11:57:20 2006 Post | Quote in Reply  
  This is funny too. But not new-thread worthy.

TUCKER CARLSON, HOST 'THE SITUATION': What exactly is Dorismar‘s extraordinary ability?

MICHAEL FELDENKRAIS, DORISMAR‘S ATTORNEY: Well, the INS has already considered her as an extraordinary ability, and that‘s probably her looks, her singing abilities, and her looks, I guess.

CARLSON: You can‘t see the screen, but we unfortunately have—we‘ve blotted out her extraordinary ability that you‘re talking about. And that‘s her rear end, of course. She was named by “Mirror” magazine as a woman who possessed one of the top 25 rear ends in all of entertainment. You‘re saying that because this girl has a cute butt, she should be a U.S. citizen?

FELDENKRAIS: Well, not necessarily U.S. citizen. But she should be allowed to be able to work in this country. She should be allowed to come in and do her performances, do whatever it is that she needs to do to proceed with her continued dream of becoming a, quote unquote, supermodel and so on and so forth. Absolutely. She should have the right to work, come in, maybe even leave, go in and out of the country. Absolutely.

CARLSON: So that—you think that that‘s a valid criterion for entry into the country, having an extraordinary body, having a cute butt. That‘s sort of—you know, all the girls with the dumpy butts don‘t get in. But the ones with the cute ones do.

FELDENKRAIS: In reality it‘s not a matter of her having a cute butt and somebody having a bad butt. But the reality is there is a classification for people who have risen to the level where she has in the scenario of...

CARLSON: Risen to the level. She stars in “Latinas gone Crazy.” Now, no offense. I haven‘t actually seen the video. But I mean, it‘s not like—I mean, she‘s not Barbra Streisand. You know what I mean? “Latinas Gone Crazy.” Do we need more “Latinas Gone Crazy” actresses in this nation, truly?

FELDENKRAIS: Well, I don‘t know if we need them or we don‘t need them. But the reality is that she is—that‘s her job. That is our job like my job is to be an attorney. Your job is to be—and each one of us has our own abilities. Her ability is to become a model that shows what men like to see in magazines like “Playboy” and so on.

CARLSON: Do you think—is there a porn shortage in this country, do you think? I mean, is there a lack of homegrown porn actresses? Is this a crisis?

FELDENKRAIS: I do not believe it‘s a crisis. There‘s definitely a lot of talent out there. And but that doesn‘t stop us from...

CARLSON: Why should we flood the market with cheap foreign imports, thereby forcing our own porn actresses out of work and oppressing their wages?

FELDENKRAIS: I don‘t think we‘re flooding them. I think one person, two people. This is not an area where you‘re going to have 200 million people coming in as porn actresses. But you will have a select few, a very good few, that will be able to do what she does. And you‘re not necessarily letting the floodgates and allowing half a million people come in just because they have a cute butt. No.

CARLSON: Let me just stop you, because we‘re out of time. But also just to stand back in awe of you, Michael Feldenkrais. If I am ever in trouble in the state of Florida, I‘m going to hire you.

You have cracked not a single smile. You are arguing with a straight face that your client ought to be allowed into the United States because she has a good body? You‘re unbelievable. You‘re a lawyer‘s lawyer, and I appreciate your coming on our show. Thank you.

FELDENKRAIS: Thank you for having me.


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