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High expectations
chanz
29 Oct 2002
I went to a family friend's engagement party recently, and it seems like this kind of stuff (weddings, engagements, registering marriages, blah blah bleagh) is the norm these days. Either that or getting attached.
I was alone, as usual, and most of my relatives and friends queried, wait that is the understatement of the year, about me going there without a female companion.
I told them dryly that I couldn't afford an escort as my Dad wasn't paying me enough. I hate events like these cos they always ask why oh why am I still single.
Dammit, I just came out of a two-year relationship, that's fucking why. Luckily, a cousin came to whisk me away before I can incite a riot.
I can actually visualize it; "Young man massacres nosy family members."
Note to self, it would have looked good on my resume.
I recounted my fiasco to a female friend over coffee a few days later and we had a great time laughing at the gettting-attached-just-because-we're-26.
But seriously, I thought about this question many times before, and sometimes some friends and my mum will ask me the same question.
"Are your expectations too high that noone can actually meet them?"
Well, to tell you honestly, I don't have high expectations. I don't actually. No, don't look at my collection of playboys and sports illustrated calendars.
Of course, I would be lying if I said looks didn't matter, but it does matter to a certain extent. Just as long as she's not a cross between Jabba the hutt and Chewbacca, I'm cool.
I'm not looking for someone that is drop dead gorgeous, but then… a man can dream right?
Ahem. Sorry for drifting off, but I know how I fare in the looks department and I am happy to find someone that is pleasant looking.
Contrary to popular believe, I do date, and no for the last time, I am not gay.
And yes I can stay committed in a relationship now. Looking at my past relationship, I reckon it's the simple things in life I am looking for.
Good conversations, quiet walks, spending quality time together and cuddling up at night. I don't think it's that high an expectation.
The whole issue here is that I believe should not start off just because of pressure or the sake of just finding someone to keep you company. I rather keep a dog. Call me old-fashioned, call me naïve, and call me a dreamer, but I still believe in fate and looking for a soul mate, not a hole mate. Isn't this how life should be?
I enjoy long walks at night, aimless drifting around the city for bargains, long drives, reading a good book on Sunday afternoons, catching up with my mates, good conversations and sharing laughs. And all I ask is for someone that enjoys these simple pleasures too. Someone who enjoys a variety of music, books and films. Someone whom I can have lengthy discussions with about anything but nothing in particular, and when we don't speak, we'd enjoy comfortable silence. Someone who share the same sense of warped humor. Someone whom I can bring home for dinner. And most importantly, someone whom I can trust and trust me too.
But looking at my past relationships and the world before me nowadays. The techno-new age world we live in, I think what I had said is somewhat too high an expectation especially for the ladies these days.
I guess simplicity itself is a high requirement now. But I don't think I should change. And hopefully one day, someone nice will spot me reading 'The Little Prince' in my favorite café and will ask if she can join me for a coffee and share her thoughts on my favorite book.
I know it's a long shot, but hey, a guy can dream right?
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