5 Mar 2005
i cried until i choked again. i almost wished i had, lying alone in the lukewarm night with only my memories and regrets to keep me warm, and they are so full of alcohol induced holes that i'll never heat.
the more i think about it the more wednesday night was a mistake. as i run things through my mind again and again it becomes clearer and clearer that you are just too precious and broken to become involved with the likes of me.
I'll burn you. twist you with flames until you don't recognise yourself anymore. i need someone strong who can handle me, who will handle me. i think i'm too selfish for you or you are too selfish for me. perhaps we're just too selfish for each other... whatever the case may be i don't think you are the man i hped you'd be but now i'm not sure if i'd rather be with you and be so wrong or be alone. It's far too cold here to be solitary. and your skin is so warm.
what happens when i meet a boy just like me