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  • The Solution to Emo
    11 Jul 2006

    There's nothing that aligns the perspective of a kid gone wrong faster than a sensible dose of beating.

    When I was a kid and wicked (in a bad, unawesome way), I wasn't asked to reflect on the morality of what I've done while listening to music, watcing TV and surfing the net grounded in my room. No. I was beaten up so bad, I knew if I kept on doing the same thing, I'd be a vegetable before I even hit my 20s.

    Even now, when I think of doing something bad, I don't do it not because it's morally wrong or because I won't go to heaven. My brain hardwires bad things to be the primary cause of absolute pain. It doesn't get more effective than that.

    Nowadays we're being bombarded by so much pussy propaganda telling us that positive reinforcement is the way to go. I suppose it could work - for certain things like animals in a lab who don't know any better. It will work on kids who get a nice warm rice meal at the end of the day at the factories. It will work for the dog who gets to eat meat more expensive than a full-protein human meal.

    I'll tell you where it won't work:


    These assholes only know how to take things for granted. Like everything's been there for them all along and nobody has tried to give it to them at a cost. Soon enough, they start becoming so damn soft their perspective of suffering becomes the slight cracks in the edges of their comfort bubble.

    I'd often see I-live-in-hell descripts from kids, as though they were actually living in labor camps. You live in a house, sleep in a dry bed and eat 3 meals a day. Where the hell is suffering there?

    Because these assholes don't know the actual feeling of pain, the have to make up their own version of suffering to fill their needs to uhm well suffer (I think that's the trend lately) to be cool by listening to suffer-me music filled with breakups, the pussy-filled dark life and borderline fellatio of self absorption. Apparently, pain has become so scarce in their lives, they're now chasing it.

    Kids today have such shallow definitions of pain and suffering (i.e. breakups, being grounded, scolded or failing in school) that when they start feeling actual pain, or worse, thinking that they do, they start trying to "escape" by cutting their lives short. Not that I'm against stupid people killing themselves but worse bit of it is they're also failing at sorting themselves out because they know shit about how life works (tip: overdosing cough syrup won't kill you, Hawking). The situation is so bad, we end up with failures who can't even fail properly.

    This world is being turned to a soft-shell pussy taco world instead of the hardass oyster festival that it's supposed to be because of these kinds of thinkers (read: dipshits)

    My solution? Start beating them up. All of them. Even if they're not your kids, it's time for some volunteer action. Negative reinforcement shall set society straight. Stop listening to those psychologists who look like nobody would bone them in a bar swimming with Ecstasy.

    Negative reinforcment isn't degenerative. It's primal. All animals survive because of it. Pain tells you what to avoid, it's why we have the sensation in the first place. Make those kids learn it the hard way.

    See parents? Beat your kids too much and they become hard rockers. Spoil them too much and they become Emo (read: societal trash). Well rockers are hella better than those assholes and their shitty music. You can't go wrong.

    What are you staring at this sentence for? Get that beatstick of justice and start whacking away the path to restoration!