The One Where Nana Dies Twice (108)

written by Marta Kaufmann and David Crane

Season 1
Where Monica Gets A New Roomate
With The Sonogram At The End
With The Thumb
With George Stephanoloulos
With The East German Laundry Detergent
With The Butt
With The Blackout
Where Nana Dies Twice
Where Underdog Gets Away
With The Monkey
With Mrs.Bing
With The Dozen Lasagnes
With The Boobies
With The Candy Hearts
With The Stoned Guy
With Two Parts, Part 1
With Two Parts, Part 2
With All The Poker
Where The Monkey Gets Away
With The Evil Orthodontist
With The Fake Monica
With The Ick Factor
With The Birth
Where Rachel Finds Out

Season 2
With Ross' New Girlfriend
With The Breast Milk
Where Heckles Dies
With Phoebe's Husband
With Five Steaks And An Eggplant
With The Baby On The Bus
Where Ross Finds Out
With The List
With Phoebe's Dad
With Russ
With The Lesbian Wedding
After The Superbowl, Part 1
After The Superbowl, Part 2
With The Prom Video
Where Ross And Rachel... You Know
Where Joey Moves Out
Where Eddie Moves In
Where Dr.Remore Dies
Where Eddie Won't Go
Where Old Yeller Dies
With The Two Bullies
With The Two Parties
With The Chickenpox
With Barry And Mindy's Wedding

Season 3
With The Princess Leia Fantasy
Where No-One's Ready
With The Jam
With The Metaphorical Tunnel
With Frank Jnr
With The Flashback
With The Race Car Bed
With The Giant Poking Device
With The Football
Where Rachel Quits
Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister
With All The Jealousy
Where Monica And Richard Are Friends
With Phoebe's Ex-Partner
Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break
With The Morning After
With The Ski Trip
With The Hypnosis Tape
With The Tiny T-Shirt
With The Dollhouse
With The Chick and the Duck
With The Screamer
With Ross's Thing
With The Ultimate Fighting Champion
At The Beach

Season 4
With The Jellyfish
With The Cat
With The 'Cuffs
With The Ballroom Dancing
With Joey's New Girlfriend
With The Dirty Girl
Where Chandler Crosses The Line
With Chandler In A Box
Where They're Gonna Party!
With The Girl From Poughkeepsie
With Phoebe's Uterus
With The Embryos
With Rachel's Crush
With Joey's Dirty Day
With All The Rugby
With The Fake Party
With The Free Porn
With Rachel's New Dress
With All The Haste
With All The Wedding Dresses
With The Invitation
With The Worst Best Man Ever
With Ross`s Wedding Part I and II

Season 5
After Ross Said Rachel
With All The Kissing
Where Phoebe Hates PBS
With All The Kips
With The Yeti
Where Ross Moves In
With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks
With Ross's Sandwich
With The Inappropriate Sister
With All The Resolutions
With Chandler's Work Laugh
With Joey's Bag
Where Everyone Finds Out
With The Girl Who Hits Joey
With A Cop
With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss
Where Rachel Smokes
Where Ross Can't Flirt
With The Ride Along
With The Ball
With Joey's Big Break
In Vegas (Season Finale/Hour Long Episode)

Season 6
After Vegas
Where Ross Hugs Rachel
With Ross's Denial
Where Joey Loses His Insurance
With Joey's Porsche
With The Last Night
Where Phoebe Runs
With Ross's Teeth
Where Ross Got High
With The Routine
With The Apothecary Table
With The Joke
With Rachels Sister
Where Chandler Can't Cry
That Could Have Been (Parts 1 & 2)
With The Unagi
Where Ross Dates A Student
With Joey's Fridge
With Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad
Where Paul's The Man
With The Ring
With The Proposal(Season Finale)

With Monica\'s Thunder
With Rachel's Book
With Phoebe's Cookies
With Rachel's Assistant
With The Engagement Picture
With The Nap Partners
With Ross's Library Book
Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs
With All The Candy
With The Holiday Armadilio
With All The Cheesecakes
Where They're Up All Night
Where Rosita Dies
Where They All Turn Thirty
With Joey's New Brain
With The Truth About London
With The Cheap Wedding Dress
With Joey's Award
With Ross and Monica's Cousin
With Rachel's Big Kiss
With The Vows
With Chandler's Dad

Season 8
After 'I Do'
With The Red Sweater
Where Rachel Tells...
With The Videotape
With Rachel's Date
With The Halloween Party
SHELLEY: Question. You're not dating anybody, are you, because I met somebody who would be perfect for you.

CHANDLER: Ah, y'see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said 'co-dependent', or 'self-destructive'...

SHELLEY: Do you want a date Saturday?

CHANDLER: Yes please.

SHELLEY: Okay. He's cute, he's funny, he's-

CHANDLER: He's a he?

SHELLEY: Well yeah! ... Oh God. I - just - I thought - Good, Shelley. I'm just gonna go flush myself down the toilet now - okay, goodbye...

CHANDLER: ...Couldn't enjoy a cup of noodles after that. I mean, is that ridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that?

RACHEL: Um... yeah. Well, I mean, when I first met you, y'know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be...

CHANDLER: You did?

RACHEL: Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.

MONICA: Hello? Hello? Oh! Rachel, it's Paolo calling from Rome.

RACHEL: Oh my God! Calling from Rome! Bon giorno, caro mio.

ROSS: So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.

CHANDLER: I just have to know, okay. Is it my hair?

RACHEL: Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. It's your hair.

PHOEBE: Yeah, you have homosexual hair.

JOEY: Now, see, I don't believe any of that. I think once you're dead, you're dead! You're gone! You're worm food!

MONICA: Mom already called this morning to remind me not to wear my hair up. Did you know my ears are not my best feature?

ROSS: Some days it's all I can think about.

CHANDLER: You're watching a football game at a funeral?

JOEY: No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.

CHANDLER: You are a frightening, frightening man.

PHOEBE: God, what a great day. ...What? Weather-wise!

MR. GELLER: Whaddya got there?

JOEY: Just a, uh... hearing disability.

MR. GELLER: What's the score?

JOEY: Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third.

MR. GELLER: Beautiful!

MRS. GELLER: Your grandmother would have hated this.

MONICA: Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all.

MRS. GELLER: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.

MONICA: That sounds like Nana.

MRS. GELLER: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?

MONICA: ...I can imagine.

MRS. GELLER: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.

MONICA: That is a wonder. So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her?

MRS. GELLER: Tell her what?

MONICA: How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like your hair... for example.

MRS. GELLER: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.

MONICA: Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her the truth?

MRS. GELLER: ...No. I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it's nicer when people just get along.


RACHEL: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?

MONICA: Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25?

CHANDLER: Good, good. Listen, heh, I dunno what Shelley told you about me, but, uh... I'm not.

LOWELL: I know. That's what I told her.



CHANDLER: So - you can tell?

LOWELL: Pretty much, most of the time. We have a kind of... radar.

CHANDLER: So you don't think I have a, a quality?

LOWELL: Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no. By the way, your friend Brian from Payroll, he is.


LOWELL: Yup, and waaay out of your league.

CHANDLER: Out of my league. I could get a Brian. If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. Hey, Brian.

transcribed by guineapig