The One Where Nana Dies Twice (108)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever |
SHELLEY: Question. You're not dating anybody, are you, because I met somebody who would be perfect for you. CHANDLER: Ah, y'see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said 'co-dependent', or 'self-destructive'... SHELLEY: Do you want a date Saturday? CHANDLER: Yes please. SHELLEY: Okay. He's cute, he's funny, he's- CHANDLER: He's a he? SHELLEY: Well yeah! ... Oh God. I - just - I thought - Good, Shelley. I'm just gonna go flush myself down the toilet now - okay, goodbye... CHANDLER: ...Couldn't enjoy a cup of noodles after that. I mean, is that ridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that? RACHEL: Um... yeah. Well, I mean, when I first met you, y'know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be... CHANDLER: You did? RACHEL: Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not. MONICA: Hello? Hello? Oh! Rachel, it's Paolo calling from Rome. RACHEL: Oh my God! Calling from Rome! Bon giorno, caro mio. ROSS: So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome. CHANDLER: I just have to know, okay. Is it my hair? RACHEL: Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. It's your hair. PHOEBE: Yeah, you have homosexual hair. JOEY: Now, see, I don't believe any of that. I think once you're dead, you're dead! You're gone! You're worm food! MONICA: Mom already called this morning to remind me not to wear my hair up. Did you know my ears are not my best feature? ROSS: Some days it's all I can think about. CHANDLER: You're watching a football game at a funeral? JOEY: No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception. CHANDLER: You are a frightening, frightening man. PHOEBE: God, what a great day. ...What? Weather-wise! MR. GELLER: Whaddya got there? JOEY: Just a, uh... hearing disability. MR. GELLER: What's the score? JOEY: Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third. MR. GELLER: Beautiful! MRS. GELLER: Your grandmother would have hated this. MONICA: Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all. MRS. GELLER: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'. MONICA: That sounds like Nana. MRS. GELLER: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say? MONICA: ...I can imagine. MRS. GELLER: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is. MONICA: That is a wonder. So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her? MRS. GELLER: Tell her what? MONICA: How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like your hair... for example. MRS. GELLER: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at. MONICA: Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her the truth? MRS. GELLER: ...No. I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it's nicer when people just get along. MONICA: Huh. RACHEL: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there? MONICA: Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25? CHANDLER: Good, good. Listen, heh, I dunno what Shelley told you about me, but, uh... I'm not. LOWELL: I know. That's what I told her. CHANDLER: Really. LOWELL: Yeah. CHANDLER: So - you can tell? LOWELL: Pretty much, most of the time. We have a kind of... radar. CHANDLER: So you don't think I have a, a quality? LOWELL: Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no. By the way, your friend Brian from Payroll, he is. CHANDLER: He is? LOWELL: Yup, and waaay out of your league. CHANDLER: Out of my league. I could get a Brian. If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. Hey, Brian.
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transcribed by guineapig
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