The One With Chandler In A Box (408)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever With Ross`s Wedding Part I and II Season 5 After Ross Said Rachel With All The Kissing Hundredth Where Phoebe Hates PBS With All The Kips With The Yeti Where Ross Moves In With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks With Ross's Sandwich With The Inappropriate Sister With All The Resolutions With Chandler's Work Laugh With Joey's Bag Where Everyone Finds Out With The Girl Who Hits Joey With A Cop With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss Where Rachel Smokes Where Ross Can't Flirt With The Ride Along With The Ball With Joey's Big Break In Vegas (Season Finale/Hour Long Episode) Season 6 After Vegas Where Ross Hugs Rachel With Ross's Denial Where Joey Loses His Insurance With Joey's Porsche With The Last Night Where Phoebe Runs With Ross's Teeth Where Ross Got High With The Routine With The Apothecary Table With The Joke With Rachels Sister Where Chandler Can't Cry That Could Have Been (Parts 1 & 2) With The Unagi Where Ross Dates A Student With Joey's Fridge With Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad Where Paul's The Man With The Ring With The Proposal(Season Finale) With Monica\'s Thunder With Rachel's Book With Phoebe's Cookies With Rachel's Assistant With The Engagement Picture With The Nap Partners With Ross's Library Book Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs With All The Candy With The Holiday Armadilio With All The Cheesecakes Where They're Up All Night Where Rosita Dies Where They All Turn Thirty With Joey's New Brain With The Truth About London With The Cheap Wedding Dress With Joey's Award With Ross and Monica's Cousin With Rachel's Big Kiss With The Vows With Chandler's Dad Season 8 After 'I Do' With The Red Sweater Where Rachel Tells... With The Videotape With Rachel's Date With The Halloween Party |
CHANDLER: Hey, by any chance did either of pick uh Rachel for your secret Santa, 'cause I wanna trade for her. PHOEBE: I picked her! Oh thank God you want her! Ooh! CHANDLER: Wow! Why do you want to get rid of her so badly? PHOEBE: Because she exchanges every gift she ever gets, it's like impossible to get her something she likes. Come on, let's trade! CHANDLER: Oh that's not true! That's not true! I got her that backpack and she loved it! I remember how much she was crying the day when that big dog ran off with it. Oh, there was no big dog. All right this sucks! I already got her this briefcase, and I had R.G. put on it. Her initials. PHOEBE: Ohh. MONICA: Well, maybe you could give to somebody else. Ooh, like Ross Geller. CHANDLER: Op, y'know what though, it's kind've a girlie briefcase. MONICA: Who cares? He works in a museum! PHOEBE: God, what happened?! MONICA: Oh my God, ice just got in my eye! RACHEL: People are trying to sleep in here! CHANDLER: Monica got ice in her eye, and it hurts. PHOEBE: Open it up, let me see. MONICA: Oh, y'know what, I can't, it really kills. CHANDLER: Well maybe you should put some ice on it. ROSS: So listen ah, I picked Monica for secret Santa, but I'm already getting her something for Chanukah, I was wondering if you wanna switch. CHANDLER: Oh y'know what, I was already trying to trade for ah, well, you. ROSS: Really?! Wow! That's-that's so nice, what are you gonna get me? CHANDLER: I don't know R.G., I was thinking something girlie for your office. ROSS: Yeah, well maybe Phoebe will switch with me. CHANDLER: Oh no-no-no, you don't want to do that, then you're gonna get stuck with Rachel and she exchanges every gift she ever gets. ROSS: Oh, that's not true! I've got her lots of stuff she never took back. CHANDLER: Like? ROSS: Like uh, that gold necklace I got her last year. CHANDLER: When was the last time you saw her wear it? ROSS: Well, she wore it all Christmas day, and then uh.... CHANDLER: Big dog? ROSS: What are you doing? JOEY: I'm sending back all this stuff that Chandler bought out of guilt. ROSS: Everything? Even the TV? JOEY: No! I'm putting that in my room. ROSS: Listen, Joey, I know what he did was wrong but don't you think you could at least hear the guy out? JOEY: Back when you and Rachel were together, if Chandler had kissed her, would you hear him out? ROSS: That's a good point. So uh, how long are you gonna punish him? JOEY: Five years. ROSS: You've sentenced him?! JOEY: Hey! Don't do the crime if you can't do the time. KATHY: Oh my God, is it really that bad? CHANDLER: I walk into a room and he won't even talk to me, he just mumbles something in Italian. And I know he only knows the bad words. JOEY: Hey Gunther, have you uh, have you seen Chandler? GUNTHER: I thought you were Chandler. ROSS: He's coming here for Thanksgiving! RACHEL: I know, it's sick. MONICA: Why is it sick? RACHEL: Because it's Richard's son! It's like inviting Greek tragedy over for dinner! MONICA: Hey, come on, Phoebe, you understand don't you? PHOEBE: Yeah, I can see where I'd be your best shot but, no. I'm sorry, but I think it's twisted. ROSS: Yeah. JOEY: What's twisted? MONICA: Me going out with Richard's son. JOEY: Ewwwww!! Ew! Ew! Ew! ROSS: Hey, y'know, Mon, if things wrong out between you and Richard's son, you'd be able to tell your kids, that you slept with their grandfather. MONICA: Fine! Judge all you want to but, married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl's wooden leg in a fire, livin' in a box!!! RACHEL: So now, what exactly is the point of the box? JOEY: Chandler? CHANDLER: The meaning of the box is three fold. One , it gives me the time to think about what I did. Two, it proves how much I care about my friendship with Joey. And three, it hurts! ROSS: Oh hey! Hey uh, you remember the necklace I gave you last year? Can I see it? RACHEL: Why? ROSS: I just wanna check something. RACHEL: Okay. Here it is! I love it. I wear it all the time. ROSS: The necklace I got you was gold, this one is silver. RACHEL: Huh, well maybe it uh, it changed. ROSS: Oh my God! You actually exchanged it! RACHEL: Well isn't it better that I exchanged it for something that I enjoy and that I can get a lot of use out of? ROSS: What did you get? RACHEL: Credit. MONICA: See he's nice. Right? PHOEBE: Yeah, but Monica, do you actually want to be in a relationship where you can actually use the phrase, "That's not how your dad used to do it." RACHEL: Don't say that I have no sentiment! This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! This is from the museum from the first time we were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter! ROSS: I don't know what to say, I'm sorry. Though, you're not supposed to take these. It's like a million years old, we, we actually, we had people looking for that. KATHY: Hey. Listen, I want you to know how sorry I am. JOEY: That's okay. Chandler's the one I'm mad at. KATHY: Well, I'm still sorry. Is he here? JOEY: In the box. KATHY: Chandler? PHOEBE: Oh, he-he can't talk right now. KATHY: Why not? What's going on? PHOEBE: He's just trying to show Joey how much he means to him. KATHY: By being in a box? RACHEL: Joey, had reasons. PHOEBE: They were threefold. KATHY: Oh. Well uh, you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm... Listen I don't wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I can't stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I don't wanna be the cause of that. So, I don't think we can see each other anymore. I'm gonna go to my mom's in Chicago, I'm gonna stay there for awhile. I think this could've be something really amazing, but y'know this is probably for the best. Y'know? I'm gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler. JOEY: Open the box!!! RACHEL: What?! JOEY: He can still catch her! Come on, get out of there! Get out of there! CHANDLER: So? JOEY: Yeah, we're gonna be fine! Get out! CHANDLER: Yeah? JOEY: Yeah, you did some real good thinkin' in there. CHANDLER: Man, this is.... JOEY: Now go! 'Cause you can still catch her! And Merry Christmas from you're secret Santa! JOEY: All right, who got Chandler? 'Cause I uh, need to trade. RACHEL: Oh, he sees her! MONICA: Oh, he's catching up to her! PHOEBE: Oh, she sees him! Oh, they're hugging! ROSS: He's taking her purse! JOEY: Uhh, that's not them. I'm gonna go call the police.
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transcribed by Eric Aasen
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