The One Where Dr.Remore Dies (218)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever With Ross`s Wedding Part I and II Season 5 After Ross Said Rachel With All The Kissing Hundredth Where Phoebe Hates PBS With All The Kips With The Yeti Where Ross Moves In With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks With Ross's Sandwich With The Inappropriate Sister With All The Resolutions With Chandler's Work Laugh With Joey's Bag Where Everyone Finds Out With The Girl Who Hits Joey With A Cop With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss Where Rachel Smokes Where Ross Can't Flirt With The Ride Along With The Ball With Joey's Big Break In Vegas (Season Finale/Hour Long Episode) Season 6 After Vegas Where Ross Hugs Rachel With Ross's Denial Where Joey Loses His Insurance With Joey's Porsche With The Last Night Where Phoebe Runs With Ross's Teeth Where Ross Got High With The Routine With The Apothecary Table With The Joke With Rachels Sister Where Chandler Can't Cry That Could Have Been (Parts 1 & 2) With The Unagi Where Ross Dates A Student With Joey's Fridge With Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad Where Paul's The Man With The Ring With The Proposal(Season Finale) With Monica\'s Thunder With Rachel's Book With Phoebe's Cookies With Rachel's Assistant With The Engagement Picture With The Nap Partners With Ross's Library Book Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs With All The Candy With The Holiday Armadilio With All The Cheesecakes Where They're Up All Night Where Rosita Dies Where They All Turn Thirty With Joey's New Brain With The Truth About London With The Cheap Wedding Dress With Joey's Award With Ross and Monica's Cousin With Rachel's Big Kiss With The Vows With Chandler's Dad Season 8 After 'I Do' With The Red Sweater Where Rachel Tells... With The Videotape With Rachel's Date With The Halloween Party |
AMBER: I want you Drake. DR. REMORE: I know you do but you and I can never be together that way. AMBER: What? DR. REMORE: There's something I never told you Amber. I'm actually your half- brother. RACHEL: So what happens next? JOEY: Well, I get the medical award for separating the siamese twins. Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramone. And that's where I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big but it's cursed. CHANDLER: God that is good TV. CHANDLER: Phoebs, play with meeee. PHOEBE: No. This game is grotesque. Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steel bar, forced to play soccer forever. Ahh, hello, human-rights violation. CHANDLER: Ya know Phoebs, don't feel so bad for 'em. After they're done playing, I break out the little plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time. ROSS: My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen. MONICA: Shut up, I'm happy. PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best. RICHARD: Oh, thank you Phoebs. That's very sweet. PHOEBE: Ok. RICHARD: Hear that? She likes me best, and apparently there've been a lot. MONICA: Not a lot, Phoebe's kidding, Phoebe's crazy. RACHEL: Phoebe's dead. PHOEBE: Hey is this true, that you write a lot of your own lines? JOEY: Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, 'If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.' PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this? JOEY: Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to my house. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, which makes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that? MONICA: Well it wasn't that many guys. I mean, if you consider how many guys there actually are, it's a very small percentage. RACHEL: Hey, it's not that big a deal, I was just curious. ROSS: G'night. RICHARD: Night Richard. Good luck Mon. MONICA: Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me how many women you've been with. RICHARD: Two. MONICA: Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you? RICHARD: Well, I mean what can I say? I, I was married to Barbara for 30 years. She was my high school sweetheart, now you, that's two. MONICA: Two it is. Ok, time for bed, I'm gonna go brush my teeth. RICHARD: Woah, woah, no wait a minute now. C'mon it's your turn. Oh c'mon. Ya know, I don't need the actual number, just a ballpark. MONICA: Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark. RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now. ROSS: Tell me about it. So what, what's your magic number? RACHEL: Uhhhooo. ROSS: C'mon, you know everyone I've been with. All, both of them. RACHEL: Well, there's you. ROSS: Better not be doin' these in order. RACHEL: Ok, uh, Billy Dreskin, Pete Carney, Barry, and uh, oh, Paolo. ROSS: Oh yes, the weenie from Torrini. RACHEL: Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him. ROSS: Really? RACHEL: Oh please. That Paolo thing was barely a relationship. All it really was was just, ya know, meaningless animal sex. Ok, ya know, that sounded soooo much better in my head. CHANDLER: Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend. EDDIE: That's very interesting, ya know, 'cause that's exactly what someone who slept with her would say. CHANDLER: This is nuts. This is crazy. She came over for like two minutes, dropped off a fish tank, and left, end of story. EDDIE: Where's Buddy? CHANDLER: Buddy? EDDIE: My fish, Buddy. CHANDLER: There was no fish when she dropped it off. EDDIE: Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligence by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy? MONICA: Ok about that two. RICHARD: What? Alright, what about my two? MONICA: Well, it just seems like a really small number. RICHARD: Right, and... MONICA: And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat? RICHARD: Honey, you are not an oat. I, I mean I don't know, I, I guess I'm just not an oat guy. I've only slept with women I've been in love with. MONICA: But you've only slept with two people. RICHARD: Right. MONICA: Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right. RICHARD: Now I do. RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh. ROSS: Oh, hey, if I make you laugh, here's an idea, why don't you invite Paulo over and have a little romp in the sack and I'll just stand in the corner and tell knock-knock jokes. RACHEL: God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was... ROSS: Animal sex, animal sex? So what're you saying, I mean, you're saying that like, there's nothing between us animal at all. I mean there's not even like, uhm, a little animal, not even, not even like, like chipmunk sex? MONICA: Hi. Richard just told me he loves me. RACHEL: Oh my God, honey that's great. MONICA: I know. I just can't find... RACHEL: Oh they're in the top drawer. Hurry. MONICA: You need one too? RACHEL: Ooooh yeah. MONICA: There's only one. RACHEL: Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month. MONICA: No. RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months. MONICA: Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan. RACHEL: Agghhh. CHANDLER: So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes. MONICA: Why? CHANDLER: Because he thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish. PHOEBE: Why would you kill his fish? CHANDLER: Because sometimes, Phoebe after you sleep with someone, you have to kill the fish. DR. REMORE: Amber, I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, as a friend and as your brother. AMBER: Oh Drake. DR HORTON: Hard day huh? First the medical award, this. DR. REMORE: Some guys are just lucky I guess. INTERCOM: Dr. Remore, report to first floor emergency, stat. DR. REMORE: Well then, uh, I uhh, guess that's me. Anyone else need to go on the elevator? Dr. Horton, Dr. Wong? DR. HORTON: No, no, they only said you. JOEY: Hey. PHOEBE: Listen, sorry about your death, that really sucks. CHANDLER: We came over as soon as we saw. ROSS: How could you not tell us? JOEY: I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out. RACHEL: Well, maybe they can find a way to bring you back. JOEY: Naa, they said that when they found my body, my brain was so smashed in that the only doctor that could have saved me was me. Supposed to be some kind of irony or somethin. CHANDLER: It's gonna be ok. You know that? JOEY: No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life. CHANDLER: I'm sorry man. RACHEL: Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us. JOEY: No, that means nothin to me.
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