The One With The Two Bullies (221)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever With Ross`s Wedding Part I and II Season 5 After Ross Said Rachel With All The Kissing Hundredth Where Phoebe Hates PBS With All The Kips With The Yeti Where Ross Moves In With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks With Ross's Sandwich With The Inappropriate Sister With All The Resolutions With Chandler's Work Laugh With Joey's Bag Where Everyone Finds Out With The Girl Who Hits Joey With A Cop With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss Where Rachel Smokes Where Ross Can't Flirt With The Ride Along With The Ball With Joey's Big Break In Vegas (Season Finale/Hour Long Episode) Season 6 After Vegas Where Ross Hugs Rachel With Ross's Denial Where Joey Loses His Insurance With Joey's Porsche With The Last Night Where Phoebe Runs With Ross's Teeth Where Ross Got High With The Routine With The Apothecary Table With The Joke With Rachels Sister Where Chandler Can't Cry That Could Have Been (Parts 1 & 2) With The Unagi Where Ross Dates A Student With Joey's Fridge With Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad Where Paul's The Man With The Ring With The Proposal(Season Finale) With Monica\'s Thunder With Rachel's Book With Phoebe's Cookies With Rachel's Assistant With The Engagement Picture With The Nap Partners With Ross's Library Book Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs With All The Candy With The Holiday Armadilio With All The Cheesecakes Where They're Up All Night Where Rosita Dies Where They All Turn Thirty With Joey's New Brain With The Truth About London With The Cheap Wedding Dress With Joey's Award With Ross and Monica's Cousin With Rachel's Big Kiss With The Vows With Chandler's Dad Season 8 After 'I Do' With The Red Sweater Where Rachel Tells... With The Videotape With Rachel's Date With The Halloween Party |
JOEY: Hey Monica, why are we watchin' the business channel? MONICA: 'Cause I was going by it the other day and I saw that there was a stock with my initials, MEG, on it and, well, sometimes I have to watch for two or three hours before it comes up again but when it does, it's pretty exciting. ROSS: Mon, speaking of which, dad says he knows someone you can call for an interview. MONICA: Really. PHOEBE: Ok, right there. That, that's the third sign today. Right there. ROSS: On behalf of everyone, I'd just like to say behuh. PHOEBE: No, 'cause you just said dad and everywhere I go today I keep getting signs telling me to go see my father. Like when I was walking over here and I passed a buffet...which is my father's last name. EVERYONE: Ahh. PHOEBE: And they were serving franks which is his first name minus the 's' at the end. And there was a rotisserie with spinning chicken. MONICA: His indian name? PHOEBE: No because I chickened out the last time when I tried to meet him. So I mean coincidences? I don't think so. ROSS: Freakish. MONICA: Wow. JOEY: Freaky. MONICA: Weird, weird. RACHEL: Ok, so uh, who wants the last hamburger? PHOEBE: Oh, alright, that's it, now I have to go see him. MONICA: Why? PHOEBE: Hamburger. McDonald's. Old MacDonald had a farm, my dad is a pharmacist. RACHEL: Hey, how'd the interview go? MONICA: It bit. It was a 50's theme restraunt. I have to cook in a costume and dance on the counter. I mean I was a chef at Cafe des Artistes. I mean how could I take a job where I have to make something called Laverne and Curly Fries? RACHEL: So don't do it. MONICA: How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank. JOEY: Monica, relax, go get a beer. MONICA: I don't want a beer. JOEY: Who said it was for you? MONICA: Hey, I went up. RACHEL: What? MONICA: My stock, MEG, it went up 2 points. Hey guys, do you realize that if I had invested my $127 in myself yesterday that I'd like have...a lot more than that today. Ya know what, I'm gonna do it. JOEY: Do what? MONICA: Put all my money in me. RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stock market. MONICA: What's to know? Buy sell, high low, bears bulls... Yes Manhattan...yeah telephone number of the stock... selling store. RACHEL: Ok, doggie get the- aahhh. Ok go get the sandwich, get the sandwich doggie. Good doggie get the sandwich, get the...ok, Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say? BIG BULLY: Maybe we didn't make it clear enough. LITTLE BULLY: Yeah. BIG BULLY: This couch belongs to us. CHANDLER: Alright, I'll tell you what, you call the couch and then, and then we'll call the couch, and we'll see who it comes to. ROSS: Alright, that's it. I've had enough of this, alright. Gunther, these guys are trying to take our seat. GUNTHER: Fellas, these guys were here first. BIG BULLY: Oh, sorry, I didn't realize. LITTLE BULLY: Sorry. GUNTHER: There you go. MONICA: I wanna buy 5 shares of SGJ and I wanna buy them now. C'mon time is money my friend. Thank you. Wooo. RACHEL: Time is money my friend? JOEY: Yeah, you missed, 'Takes money to make money,' and uh, 'Don't make me come down there and kick your Wall Street butt.' MONICA: Hey, I made $17 before breakfast, what have you done? JOEY: Well uh, I had breakfast here so technically I saved $3.50. RACHEL: How did you make $17. MONICA: Well, my financially challenged friends, I split my money and I bought some shares of CHP and ZXY. JOEY: How come those? MONICA: Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Eric Estrada. And ZXY becuase I think it sounds zexy. RACHEL: What happened to uh, MEG.? MONICA: MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down. JOEY: That is so not my motto. ROSS: No. Man I don't wanna have to have Joey with me every time I wanna descent cup of coffee. Ya know, and I don't wanna spend the rest of my life drinking cappucino with a 'K'. I say you and I go back down there and stand up to those guys. CHANDLER: Alright, hang on a second there Custer. JOEY: Yeah really, Ross, have you ever been beaten up before? ROSS: Yeah, sure. JOEY: By someone besides Monica? ROSS: No. So what. So what if we get beaten up, maybe that's just something every man has to go through once in his life. Ya know, like a, like a right of passage or somethin'. CHANDLER: Well, couldn't we just lose our virginities again? Ya know, because I think actually mine's growing back. PHOEBE: Hi. MRS BUFFAY: Schnoodle. Oh my God, what the hell happened to my dog? PHOEBE: It was an accident, and, and the woman who did this would never ever hurt a dog on purpose. She's a vegetarian. MRS BUFFAY: What are these, stitches? PHOEBE: Yeah, eight of them. That's 56 to him. You know also, if, if it's raining, you can't let him look up too long 'cause that cone'll fill up really really fast. FRANK: Hey lady. Hey wait up. How do you know my dad? PHOEBE: Um well I don't really. Just genetically. He's kinda my dad too. FRANK: Heavy. PHOEBE: Yeah. So um, did he ever talk about me, Phoebe? FRANK: No but he didn't really talk about anything. PHOEBE: Oh. FRANK: Except stilts. PHOEBE: Stilts? FRANK: Yeah, he loved stilts. One time I was upstairs, I was stealing cigarettes out of my mom's purse, and uh, all of a sudden I look over and there's my dad's head bobbing past the window. He just had this big smile on his face and he was waving 'cause he was always happiest when he was on his stilts. PHOEBE: Wow. FRANK: Yeah. PHOEBE: I don't know what to do with that. FRANK: Me neither. FRANK: So you're like my big sister. PHOEBE: Yeah. FRANK: This is huge, you can buy me beer. PHOEBE: Alright. So um, stilts huh? FRANK: Yeah hey, you know if you want I can take you around back and show you where he hit his head on the rain gutter. PHOEBE: Ok. ROSS: Before I forget, are we hitting faces? BIG BULLY: Of course we're hitting faces, why wouldn't you hit faces? ROSS: Well because I have to work on Monday, I have a big presentation. LITTLE BULLY: Actually, you know, uh, I gotta show this apartment tomorrow and uh, you know, this no faces thing might not be a bad idea. BIG BULLY: Ok, nothing from the neck up. Or the waist down. Dana's ovulating. LITTLE BULLY: Oh really, you guys tryin' again? BIG BULLY: Yeah. CHANDLER: Ok, so let me just get this straight. So we're uh, strictly talking about the middle? BIG BULLY: C'MON!
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transcribed by Joshua Hodge
51982
