The One With The Breast Milk (202)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever With Ross`s Wedding Part I and II Season 5 After Ross Said Rachel With All The Kissing Hundredth Where Phoebe Hates PBS With All The Kips With The Yeti Where Ross Moves In With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks With Ross's Sandwich With The Inappropriate Sister With All The Resolutions With Chandler's Work Laugh With Joey's Bag Where Everyone Finds Out With The Girl Who Hits Joey With A Cop With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss Where Rachel Smokes Where Ross Can't Flirt With The Ride Along With The Ball With Joey's Big Break In Vegas (Season Finale/Hour Long Episode) Season 6 After Vegas Where Ross Hugs Rachel With Ross's Denial Where Joey Loses His Insurance With Joey's Porsche With The Last Night Where Phoebe Runs With Ross's Teeth Where Ross Got High With The Routine With The Apothecary Table With The Joke With Rachels Sister Where Chandler Can't Cry That Could Have Been (Parts 1 & 2) With The Unagi Where Ross Dates A Student With Joey's Fridge With Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad Where Paul's The Man With The Ring With The Proposal(Season Finale) With Monica\'s Thunder With Rachel's Book With Phoebe's Cookies With Rachel's Assistant With The Engagement Picture With The Nap Partners With Ross's Library Book Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs With All The Candy With The Holiday Armadilio With All The Cheesecakes Where They're Up All Night Where Rosita Dies Where They All Turn Thirty With Joey's New Brain With The Truth About London With The Cheap Wedding Dress With Joey's Award With Ross and Monica's Cousin With Rachel's Big Kiss With The Vows With Chandler's Dad Season 8 After 'I Do' With The Red Sweater Where Rachel Tells... With The Videotape With Rachel's Date With The Halloween Party |
ROSS: What are you guys doing? CHANDLER: We're just hanging out by the spoons. Ladle? ROSS: Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing in the world. JOEY: Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it. ROSS: This is my son having lunch, ok? CHANDLER: Carol, Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question about breast-feeding? CAROL: Sure. JOEY: Uh, does it hurt? CAROL: It did at first, but not anymore. JOEY: Chandler? CHANDLER: So, uh, how often can you do it? CAROL: As much as he needs. JOEY: Ok, I got one, I got one. If he blows into one, does the other one get bigger? JOEY: Monica what're you doin'? You can't go shopping with her? What about Rachel? MONICA: It's gonna be a problem, isn't it? CHANDLER: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdales with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship. MONICA: But I'm- PHOEBE: Monica, she will kill you. She will kill you like a dog in the street. MONICA: Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we were shopping all day. PHOEBE: What? MONICA: We were shopping, and we had lunch. PHOEBE: Oh, all right. What did I have? MONICA: You had a salad. PHOEBE: Oh, no wonder I don't feel full. RACHEL: Hey, guys, what's up. PHOEBE: I went shopping with Monica all day, and I had a salad. RACHEL: Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy? PHOEBE: Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur. RACHEL: You went shopping for fur? PHOEBE: Yes, and then I realized I'm against that, and uh, so then we bought some, uh, boobs. RACHEL: You bought boobs? PHOEBE: Bras! We bought bras! We bought bras. PHOEBE: Ben, dinner! ROSS: Thanks Aunt Pheebs. Hey, you didn't microwave that, did you, because it's breast milk, and you're not supposed to do that. PHOEBE: Duh, I think I know how to heat breast milk. Ok. CHANDLER: What did you just do? PHOEBE: I licked my arm, what? ROSS: It's breast milk. PHOEBE: So? RACHEL: Phoebe, that is juice, squeezed from a person. JOEY: What is the big deal? CHANDLER: What did you just do? ROSS: Ok, would people stop drinking the breast milk? PHOEBE: You won't even taste it? ROSS: No! PHOEBE: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk? ROSS: Not even if Carol's breast had a picture of a missing child on it. RACHEL: Mon, if uh you were at lunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53 dollars? MONICA: You know what probably happened? Someone musta stolen my credit card. RACHEL: And sorta just put the receipt back in your pocket MONICA: That is an excellent excellent question. That is excellent. RACHEL: Monica, what is with you? Who'd you have lunch with? MONICA: Judy. RACHEL: Who? MONICA: Julie. RACHEL: What? MONICA: Jody. RACHEL: You were with Julie? MONICA: Look, when it started I was just trying to be nice to her because she was my brother's girlfriend. And then, one thing led to another and, before I knew it, we were...shopping. RACHEL: Oh. Oh my god. MONICA: Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn't mean anything to me. RACHEL: Yeah, right. MONICA: Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out. CAROL: How did we do? PHOEBE: Oh, I tasted Ben's milk, and Ross freaked out. ROSS: I did not freak out. CAROL: Why'd you freak out? ROSS: Because it's breast milk. It's gross. CAROL: My breast milk is gross? SUSAN: This should be fun. ROSS: No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. I just don't think breast milk is for adults. CHANDLER: Of course the packaging does appeal to grown-ups and kids alike. CAROL: Ross, you're being silly. I've tried it, it's no big deal. Just taste it. ROSS: That would be no. PHOEBE: Come on. It doesn't taste bad. JOEY: Yeah, it's kinda sweet, sorta like, uh- SUSAN: Cantaloupe juice. JOEY: Exactly. ROSS: You've tasted it? You've tasted it. SUSAN: Uh huh. ROSS: Oh, you've tasted it. SUSAN: You can keep saying it, but it won't stop being true. ROSS: Gimme the bottle. Gimme the towel. JOEY: Or maybe it's because this guy's doing so good they wanna put more people on it. You should see this guy, Chandler, he goes through two bottles a day. CHANDLER: What do you care? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you. JOEY: I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best. I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game. They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese. CHANDLER: All right, say you do that. You know sooner or later somebody's gonna come along that slices a better cheddar. And then where're you gonna run? JOEY: Yeah I guess you're right. CHANDLER: You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie. MONICA: I don't know what else to say. RACHEL: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening. MONICA: I feel terrible, I really do. RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, did my back hurt your knife? MONICA: Rachel, say that I'm friends with her, we spend some time together. Is that so terrible? RACHEL: Yes. MONICA: It's that terrible? RACHEL: Yes. Monica, you don't get it. It's bad enough that she's stolen the guy who might actually be the person that I am supposed to be with, but now, she's actually, but now she's actually stealing you. MONICA: Me? What are you talking about? Nobody could steal me from you. I mean, just because I'm friends with her doesn't make me any less friends with you. I mean, you're my...We're, we're...Oh, I love you. RACHEL: I love you too. PHOEBE: You guys, um I know that this really doesn't have anything to do with me, but um I love you guys too. Oh, I really needed that. RACHEL: So. I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit. I mean, you know, we've never really talked. I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us, though, right? JULIE: I know, I probably shouldn't even tell you this, but I'm pretty much totally intimidated by you. RACHEL: Really? Me? JULIE: Yes. Oh my god, are you kidding? Ross is so crazy about you, and I really wanted you to like me, and, it's probably me being totally paranoid, but I kinda got the feeling that maybe you don't. RACHEL: Well, you're not totally paranoid. JULIE: Oy. RACHEL: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right. JULIE: Thanks. Hey, listen, would you like to go to a movie sometime or something? RACHEL: Yeah, that'd be great. I'd love it. JULIE: I'd love it too. Shoot, I gotta go. So, I'll talk to you later. RACHEL: All right, Julie. What a manipulative bitch.
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transcribed by Mindy Mattingly Phillips
51982
