The One With The Jellyfish (401)
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Season 1 Where Monica Gets A New Roomate With The Sonogram At The End With The Thumb With George Stephanoloulos With The East German Laundry Detergent With The Butt With The Blackout Where Nana Dies Twice Where Underdog Gets Away With The Monkey With Mrs.Bing With The Dozen Lasagnes With The Boobies With The Candy Hearts With The Stoned Guy With Two Parts, Part 1 With Two Parts, Part 2 With All The Poker Where The Monkey Gets Away With The Evil Orthodontist With The Fake Monica With The Ick Factor With The Birth Where Rachel Finds Out Season 2 With Ross' New Girlfriend With The Breast Milk Where Heckles Dies With Phoebe's Husband With Five Steaks And An Eggplant With The Baby On The Bus Where Ross Finds Out With The List With Phoebe's Dad With Russ With The Lesbian Wedding After The Superbowl, Part 1 After The Superbowl, Part 2 With The Prom Video Where Ross And Rachel... You Know Where Joey Moves Out Where Eddie Moves In Where Dr.Remore Dies Where Eddie Won't Go Where Old Yeller Dies With The Two Bullies With The Two Parties With The Chickenpox With Barry And Mindy's Wedding Season 3 With The Princess Leia Fantasy Where No-One's Ready With The Jam With The Metaphorical Tunnel With Frank Jnr With The Flashback With The Race Car Bed With The Giant Poking Device With The Football Where Rachel Quits Where Chandler Can`t Remember Which Sister With All The Jealousy Where Monica And Richard Are Friends With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break With The Morning After With The Ski Trip With The Hypnosis Tape With The Tiny T-Shirt With The Dollhouse With The Chick and the Duck With The Screamer With Ross's Thing With The Ultimate Fighting Champion At The Beach Season 4 With The Jellyfish With The Cat With The 'Cuffs With The Ballroom Dancing With Joey's New Girlfriend With The Dirty Girl Where Chandler Crosses The Line With Chandler In A Box Where They're Gonna Party! With The Girl From Poughkeepsie With Phoebe's Uterus With The Embryos With Rachel's Crush With Joey's Dirty Day With All The Rugby With The Fake Party With The Free Porn With Rachel's New Dress With All The Haste With All The Wedding Dresses With The Invitation With The Worst Best Man Ever |
PHOEBE SR.: Remember how I told you how Lily, Frank, and I we were, we were close. Well, we were, we were very close. PHOEBE: How close? PHOEBE SR.: Well, the-the three of us we were, kind of umm, a couple. PHOEBE: I don't even know how that would work! PHOEBE SR.: Well, we were - PHOEBE: I'm not asking! PHOEBE SR.: Well, any how, some how I got pregnant, and, and I was scared. I was stupid and sellfish, and I was 18 years old. I mean, you remember what it's like to be eighteen years old? PHOEBE: Yeah. Let's see, my had Mom killed herself, and my Dad had run off, and I was living in a Gremlin with a guy named Cindy who talked to his hand. CHANDLER: All right, there's a nuclear holocaust, I'm the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me? MONICA: Ennnh. CHANDLER: I've got canned goods. JOEY: Hey, you guys! Take a look at this! Check this baby out, dug me a hole! CHANDLER: Excellent hole, Joe. MONICA: Oh damn the jellyfish. Damn all the jellyfish! CHANDLER: We've got to do something! JOEY: Well, there's really only one thing you can do. MONICA: What?! What is it?! JOEY: You're gonna have to pee on it. MONICA: What?! Gross! JOEY: Don't blame me, I saw it on The Discovery Channel. RACHEL: How was the beach? MONICA: Nothing, I don't know. ROSS: What happened? MONICA: Nothing. I'm gonna take a shower. CHANDLER: Me too! JOEY: Me too. ROSS: She wants me to take responsibility for everything that went wrong in our relationship. I mean she goes on for five pages about, about how I was unfaithful to her! Well... WE WERE ON A BREAK!!! CHANDLER: Oh my God! If you say that one more time, I'm gonna break up with you! ROSS: Fine! Fine! But this break-up was not all my fault, and she, she says here, "If you accept full responsibility...", Full responsibility! "...I can begin to trust you again. Does that seem like something you can do." Does it?! JOEY: No? CHANDLER: Look, Ross, you have what you want, you're back with Rachel. If you bring this up now you're gonna wreck the best thing that even happened to you. ROSS: Yeah, I know. I mean, no, you're right. Yeah I guess I'll let it go. But you-you understand how-how hard it is to forget about this. JOEY: Sure, it's hard to forget! But that doesn't mean you have to talk about it! A lot of things happened on that trip that we should never, ever talk about. ROSS: What the hell happened on that beach?! JOEY: It's between us and the sea, Ross! PHOEBE: Hi, Ursula. URSULA: Hey! PHOEBE: Okay, well umm, I know that we haven't talked in a long time, but umm okay, our Mom is not our birth Mom. This-this other lady is our birth Mom. URSULA: Right, okay, the one that lives in Montuak, umm-hmm. PHOEBE: You know her?! URSULA: No, I umm, I read about her in Mom's suicide note. PHOEBE: There-there was a suicide note?! Well, do you still have it? URSULA: Hang on. PHOEBE: I can't believe you didn't tell me there was a suicide note! URSULA: Yeah. So how have you been doing? PHOEBE: I, umm, shut up! PHOEBE: "Good-bye Phoebe and Ursula. I'll miss you. P.S. Your Mom lives in Montauk." You just wrote this! URSULA: Well, it's pretty much the gist. Well, except for the poem. You read the poem, right? PHOEBE: Noooo!! URSULA: All right, hang on! ROSS: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... Ewwww!!! You peed on yourself?! PHOEBE and RACHEL: Ewwww!!! MONICA: You can't say that! You-you don't know! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldn't...bend that way. So... PHOEBE, ROSS, and RACHEL: Ewwww!!! JOEY: That's right I stepped up! She's my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, I'd pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldn't. I got the stage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned to Chandler. CHANDLER: Joey kept screaming at me, Do it now! Do it!! Do it! Do it now!! Sometimes late at night I can still here the screaming. JOEY: That's 'cause sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out. MONICA: Gin. CHANDLER: We were playing Gin? Y'know if we were a couple, we could play this game naked. MONICA: Will you stop! CHANDLER: Okay. All right. MONICA: Okay, all right, I think you're great, I think you're sweet, and you're smart, and I love you. But you will always be the guy who peed on me.
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transcribed by Eric Aasen
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